A few points:
1. He's not a real Republican and not a real conservative. Anyone who thinks so is drunk.
2. He's not really pro-Life. Anyone who thinks so is stoned.
3. He's not really a billionaire. If he were to really run for President, presumably we'd get to look behind the Potemkin village of creditors that make up the Donald's empire.
4. No one, and I repeat, no one can be elected President who's been a game show host.
5. No one, and I repeat, no one can be elected who says "motherf***ers" in public, as Trump did today.
6. Finally, we can't have this hair in the White House.
Americans can't be stupid enough to elect a jerk just because he's posing as a faux populist.
Or can they?